when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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