and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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