on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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