This dress was meant to end up on your floor
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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