I'm lost and stupid without you.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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