sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just gargled with NyQuil
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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