I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
