So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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