just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
