for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
She bit a glass in half.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
