I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize