My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize