I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize