Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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