A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
