You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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