if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
