he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
