you turned your livingroom into a bong?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
i need some magic done to my vagina
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize