two words: eviction party
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize