he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
