If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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