I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
