PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Randomize
