i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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