Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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