why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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