nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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