I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Randomize
