I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
