you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
