Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize