check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
