Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
even my farts smell like vagina
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize