So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
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