You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize