whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
