Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
