No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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