yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
