My first STD was from a foam party
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
