just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
barbara walters just said penis...
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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