May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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