The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
We were destined to go to rehab together
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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