The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
