Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
