party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
