I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Randomize
