I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
