? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
