I'm going to jail i love you
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Randomize
