Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
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