billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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